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5 Helpful Tips For Learning Your Child’s Love Language

Here are some examples of how love languages show up for children, and ways you can show up for them!

“Help Me”

Children will sometimes show that they want extra time with parents by asking for help. Sometimes they really need this help, but other times it’s a way of asking for nurturing, even when they already know how to do what they are asking you to do. Do you have a kiddo who knows how to put on their socks, but holds them up and says, “You do it.”? What your child might really be wanting is nurturance and reassurance. While they may physically be able to do this task they may emotionally be wanting some support. Try balancing this need with encouraging them to try the part on their own that they CAN do.

“Give Me”

Most children want gifts and ask for things. It’s in our nature as humans. It’s a child’s job to ask for things, and it’s a parent’s job to stand firmly in the limits and boundaries, while simultaneously allowing the child to have all their feelings about it. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that buying your child gifts is the only way for them to feel loved. This is just not the case with most children. In fact, children who are given things as the only way of receiving love, often struggle to internalize this feeling of love, and continue to look outside of themselves for this. While it may be a way that they are trying to get love, what really feels good to children is having firm and clear boundaries and having parents who can tolerate and accept all their big feelings and disappointment.

“Play with Me”

All children can benefit from sustained adult attention. Some children like when adults get on the floor and play along with them, other children like when adults just watch them play, and reflect understanding and connection.

“Hug me”

Lots of research has shown that humans need touch to support their mental health. What kind of touch and how much can greatly vary for each individual. Some kids love hugs and snuggles, and others do not. Allow your child to set boundaries around the type of touch they want. Children who are non-verbal may express their likes and dislikes with non-verbal cues.

“Tell me”

Many kids benefit from words of affirmation! Hearing daily that they are loved and cherished and wanted, can really help children formulate a story about themselves and their belonging in the family. For other children, the words don’t matter as much as the actions. They may need to hear the affirmations over and over- when just 20 minutes of play time seems to fill them up. If your child shrugs off your messages with an eye roll and an, “Ugh Dad, I know you love me.” Don’t be so quick to stop saying it. Sometimes kids don’t let on that these affirmations can mean a lot to them.

source: THRIVE GLOBAL

Nutcrackers Daycare Academy We are a family owned and operated academy that provides children with a strong foundation to begin their lives. Our teachers are highly trained and extremely attentive to support your child’s desire to explore and discover. Our passionate staff values the relationships we have with our families and work hard to involve them in all our activities and decisions. Our facility provides an openness inside and out for a child to feel free to explore, create, and learn in a safe, loving and developmentally appropriate environment. Contact at 713-842-7796.

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